Here I am - Leona Lewis

This is a crazy world
These can be lonely times
It's hard to know who's on your side
Most of the time

Who can you really trust
Who do you really know
Is there anybody out there
Who can make you feel less alone
Some times you just can't make it on your own

If you need a place where you can run
If you need a shoulder to cry on
I'll always be your friend

When you need some shelter from the rain
When you need a healer for your pain
I will be there time and time again
When you need someone to love you
Here I am, hmmm

If you have broken dreams
Just lay them all on me
I'll be the one who understands
So take my hand

If you reach emptyness

You know I'll do my best
To fill you up with all the love
That I can show someone
I promise you you'll never walk alone

Well if you need a place where you can run
If you need a shoulder to cry on
I'll always be your friend

When you need some shelter from the rain
When you need a healer for your pain
I will be there time and time again
When you need someone to love you
Here I am, oooo

Everybody needs somebody who
keep a heart and soul in two

Well if you need a place where you can run
If you need a shoulder to cry on
I'll always be your friend

When you need some shelter from the rain
When you need a healer for your pain
I will be there time and time again
When you need someone to love you
Here I am, Here I am

My words to myself ...

I shall change for the better

It is an unusual way we meet and become together.
It is a random love but the love both share are not any random love.
I am childish, I am inmature, I am always thinking too much but
you are always there to reassure me things will be fine. & all I ever
need and want is all your love. Life ahead maybe hard and tough but
I believe we will make it there !

&
I will slowly change myself, kicking away all the bad habits I have
and I swear I will become a better lover. Although I am not perfect
but I will always try to be a perfect guy for you in every way I could
possibly do it because I had love you too much.

<3

Are you sure ?

That is what I asked myself 1days ago.
But after today, I am going to ask " Yes,I am sure and I have never been so sure in life before."

Then there was another question threw at me, " You really think long distance relationship can work?"
If it is me 2 days ago or if it is another person I will probably answered " I also dunno lei" but now
"I will answer with all my confidence, yes and we will try our very best, a clap takes 2 hands to clap and if the 2 hands did it then after the 3years that we maybe apart nothing much can stand in our way already." Distance or being separated by distance is not a bad thing, it actually made me treasure the time we have together more.

and I am serious that in my 18 years of life, I have never treasure time like how I am doing it now!

a day to rest

It is true about the saying that sad people for generally more weak and have lower in immue system. I have be very depressed these days and I am finally sick now. Down with fever,runny nose,cough and body ache. I guess it is a good time for me to rest my body and self .

MC for 2 days ...

My love for you is deep and meaningless

I, I don't know why I miss you so much
Yeah I, I don't know why I still feel your touch
You, you left me feeling high and dry
With nothing, nothing but the question why

Yeah you, I guess you had another direction
And leaving me with nothing but a dead connection

Chorus:
If you call me today
I'll say that I'm fine
But I bet you can tell by the tone of my voice
It's just a lie
You knew what you had
You still walked away leaving me in this mess
My love for you is deep and meaningless

You, you knew what you were doing to me
And I, I guess I was too blind to see
Well you hit where it hurt and you fooled me so bad
But I'd do it again to relive what we had
(Damn that's sad)

There are many things left to remind me
Of a love that I just can't leave behind me

Chorus (Repeat)

~ Probably this lyric really express my feelings ~
Like what the lyric had express , "You, you left me feeling high and dry
With nothing, nothing but the question why? & You, you knew what you were doing to me
And I, I guess I was too blind to see Well you hit where it hurt and you fooled me so bad"
Previously maybe I do not know why but now I know the reason. & yes it is hurtful and extremely K.O for me. But my crying will come to a stop soon and I will start to pick up myself again. If you really care for me, don't ask me what happen because you are simply reminding me of my past again.

2010 Reflections

2010 has been a very happy and devasting year for me. From lossing I gain back and thats friendship I am refering to. I reconciled with my old friends (Darren,Dillon,Gary,Suen,Munyee) whom I have quarrelled with when I was in Sec 4. Reconcile with them has never been thought of because our last quarrel was tough and fierce one! Everyone thought it was the end of our friendship but somehow things didn't turned out what it was predicted. Being back with them had brought me many joys and laughther in my life again. Throughout this year they had been with me,being there for me and we were just like before. I also believed that quarrels had brought our distance closer. Though Darren always say that " we don't understand each other that much" but my answer now is 'Who really understand themselves that much ?' even I don't understand myself at times how can I understand people who are not even me ? Misundserstanding in friendship does always happen here and there, it is how we handle it that makes the difference and at least after every misunderstandings we will forgive and forget. Our friendship is not as strong as what it may seems but I am sure everyone in the clique will strive their best to maintain this friendship.

In terms of relationship, I have gain and I have loss. We started dating in around march and we stead in around May and finally our relationship is put to a test which we both cannot make it through in December. Throughout this 9months, I can say I really did love you alot but in the end I ended this relationship. Why? It is not because I have stop loving you already but I don't have confidence in our relationship. There is these phrase I had before " Loving someone having that someone". If you learn how to love you must also learn how to un-love. As you know I will be leaving like in 4months time and I will be gone for like at least 6months. I don't want myself to suffer in feeling of missing you and not been there with you when you need me. Thus ending it early will stop me from having all this feelings and it will be better off for me. I know I am selfish but who is not ? Who doesn't wants the best for themselves ? I am afraid, I don't how life will be outside there. Fearing is enough already, I don't want to have missing feelings to add on to my agony. I can only say I am sorry. Though this relationship has ended but I just hope once in a while you will think of me. For now, I am upset , very upset. I have been crying whenever I think of the past and what I have done. But "a moment of pain is better than prolong pain!". & deep in my heart I know I still do love you. Everything has an ending and this is our ending.

~The end~

Suen's Birthday !

Happy 18th Birthday to SUEN !
Finally you are 18 years old le ...
So how did we celebration suen birthday ???
>< >< ><

She booked a hotel in Sentosa at Siloso Beach there. All the cliques members and Melvin and Qiqi was invited. It is the first time at that hotel for the most of us. It is really a greenery hotel, everywhere is trees and flower !

After we settle down abit, some of us went to swim while some were playing the Monopoly Deal cards. I went to swim and I swear it is the coldest pool I have ever swam in my life !!! It is frezeeing cold ... Anyway after a while it felt better,guess my body was adpating to it ! Suen,Lon and I swam only so we went around and play and we even played with the slides and the pool .. woohoo ! It was so fun =DD

After swim, we went for dinner as everyone was getting abit hungry from the 'high-ness' ... So we dapao KFC back to the hotel to dine as the restaurant was packed ! Before going back to the hotel we went to the ResortWorld and do some phototaking as some of us had never been there ! SUAKU ... ~iam one of them~

Next comes the CAKE CUTTING TIME ! yeah ! We sang and took candid photos with the Birthday girl . After we ate the cake, it was about time for munyee to return home so we walked her to the train station and we went to WaveHouse for some chilling =D .. & it is drinking time again ! So while drinking we played Monopoly deal again .. Looks like it has slowly becoming our favourite game! As usual Darren face was burning red and mine was red .. I was abit drunk I guess .. haha =X

h

After drinking we went back to the hotel and slack and HBO was playing the movie Quarantine and we started watching it. Darren and Xiaowei was freak out by the show. But i guess it was a nice movie ! So after the movie we started to feel tired and we went to sleep liao !

& Thats not the end ! After we check out at 12pm some of us went back home to sleep for a few hours and washing up as we stayed nearby sentosa and meet again for ROUND 2 celebrations for SUEN ! We meet for dinner at Chinatown and after dinner some of us went home and Lon,Dengyi and suen and I went to Vivo to SING K !!! We sang from 9pm to 12am and IT IS TIME TO COUNTDOWN FOR 2011 ! But in the end the countdown at Vivocity is dull and boring -.- ! After the fireworks we walked to darren's place there to have supper before Suen and I head home !

~post to be continued !~